My husband wants to be a church planter, what does that make me? Many women are faced with dilemma’s in life where God has a calling on their husband and by proxy, they are forced to go too. I was asked by numerous people how I felt about leaving the church of my youth, the church of my first pastorate, and the city where we owned our beautiful home to live in a 5th wheel, travel for 18 months, and ultimately move into a strange area where there is nothing and carve out a work. My answer to that was, I feel great! Not that this situation doesn’t present an almost daily struggle of time management, money management, family organization, and endless questioning, but I know that God would never call a man to such a drastic change without calling the whole family. Many people believe that it is the wife’s roll to submit to all choices that her husband makes, and while that does have a Biblical precedent, a loving God would never require a woman to sell all, take up her cross and family and move into the unknown as an act of submission. How detrimental to your family and marriage would it be to have to “submit” to such a large act? I believe that God calls every member of a family when he has such a high calling. Many times the wives and the children are not questioning their husbands decisions and rebelling against his choice, they are rebelling against the call of God on their lives.
God has given me a very clear and great vision for what he wants to do in the Cleveland Metropolitan area. This involves me being the leader of home groups, leading prayer groups, leading musical groups, and ministering. Many times this will also involve me doing nothing more that being willing to go along with my husbands ideas and schemes. Preparing a diaper bag, ironing clothes, and comforting the children is oftentimes the most spiritual thing that a young mother and wife can do. However, ladies, don’t sell yourselves short. God desires great things from you that go beyond cleaning spit up. While making your families beds can be spiritual, don’t let your role as CEO of a family overtake your role as a child of God. Be sensitive to the calling on your life. Don’t let your husbands be the ear of God for your families all the time while you sit content to just “submit”. Ephesians says that we have a boldness through Christ Jesus our Lord and a confident access to him through faith. If you allow your husband to always be the ear of God to your family it will be a question of “Marriage or Mayhem”.
Although submission is a volatile word for some marriages and families, it doesn’t have to be. It can be a very easy and beautiful thing. When a husband and wife love each other, communicate with each other, and communicate with God, submission is never a question. Don’t criticize each other about a calling that one or both of you feel. This will send you running back to your comfort zone, a place that God doesn’t want us to be in.
Prov 15:1A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger KJV