Finally Here

Hello to one and all. I have not fallen off the face of the earth, just off the face of cyberspace. We were having Internet issues and had to return our USB Internet which allows us access to the Internet anywhere while on the road, even places where there is no wireless Internet, and wait for our new one. Once that happened, I have only had brief glimpses of time to check my E-mail.

We are currently in the good ol‘ Buckeye state on deputation. We are parked in Rittman, Ohio and will be headed to the Columbus and Cincinnati areas for the next two weeks. After that we are in Wolverine country. My only hope is that I have enough OSU clothes for my boys to wear everyday while in Michigan=)

Gentry is so adorable. While we celebrate and remember a horrible day in our nations history today, September 11, Gentry marks the 9 month milestone in his life. He is hilarious. What 9 month old do you know that says “Amen” and “Thank You”. I think we have him in church too often. He raises his little hands up and shouts out Amen quite frequently. Even a photographer at JcPenney portrait studio commented on Gentry’s verbal abilities. She gave me quite the compliment though and said that he must be from a very polite family to already be able to say “Thank You” at 9 months old.

We were in the Cleveland area the first couple of days this week. What a joy to be able to spend time in the city that God has called us too. While there, we made several contacts and really enjoyed the friendliness of all the citizens. I had to chuckle to myself while thinking of the book “How to win friends and influence people”. I know that every moment and second of every day in Cleveland will be a strategic time for me to pour of myself into some body’s life, build relationships, and hopefully lead them to a full walk in Christ. I was teasing my husband on my friend building and witnessing techniques and thought I would share them with you.

Technique #5:
Rear end somebody with your car. This will force you to have common ground to discuss and build a relationship where one might not have existed before. Think of all the contacts you can get with this technique. You can meet the driver and passengers of the car, the police officers, the insurance adjusters, rental car personnel, and body shop technicians.

Technique #4:
Plant a small insect into your food at a neighborhood diner. This technique will draw attention to your table and cause numerous customers to comment on your situation. Again, this creates common ground and an open door for communication. You can befriend the waiter, the customers, the health inspector, and possibly even a lawyer.

Technique #3:
Acquire Parking Tickets. This technique we actually tried while in North Olmsted unfortunately. We were not strategic in using this idea because my mother, a current resident of North Olmsted/ Cleveland, assured us that parking on the street was perfectly legal and we wouldn’t get a ticket. We came out the next morning and had to flush $15 down the toilet. Oh well, at least it is $15 invested into the community of our calling. After this, we were able to meet several people at the police station and the idea of parking illegally became a soul winning technique.

Technique #2:
Grow really long hair, a shaggy beard, wear no shoes, yell things at people, and eat locust. So many churches are invested into old fashioned, traditional techniques that have little bearing on 21st century people that I thought why not go really old fashioned? Adopt the John the Baptist lifestyle and surely you will win friends, be offered jobs, and lead folks to Christ.

Technique #1:
Unleash the power of Reese. Reese has the uncanny ability to meet everyone at every place that we go to. Reese’s very presence somewhere goes noticed by everyone. I theorize that if I completely stop disciplining him and let him do whatever he wants and be left to his own devices I would open many doors for our family. We may come into contact eventually with planned parenthood, juvenile services, local psychiatrists, the school principals, and possibly through those contacts grow our church.

Disclaimer: These techniques are for joking purposes only. Any attempts to use them in church growth planning, job hunting, or friend winning can and will be used against you in a court of law.


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